The Cure For What Ales Ya

Yuck.

The first few days of the 2019 Major League Baseball season have been rather dreadful for us Cubs faithful. After handily winning the opening game on the road in Texas, the Chicagoans blew two winnable games due to a horrible performance from the bullpen and then proceeded to get slaughtered (8-0 with six errors) in Atlanta during the Braves home opener.  I know it's only the first week of the baseball calendar and everything seems worse in small samples... but, yikes.  So far, this year's club looks a lot more like the "Lovable Losers" of old than the Theo-cratic Cubs dynasty.

Hopefully, the wrinkles get ironed out soon; otherwise, the Brewers and the Cardinals are going to ensure that this be a long season on the North Side.  As we speak, I'm sure PECOTA is readying their "I told you so" articles.

On the plus side, should shit hit the fan, I now have the perfect beverage with which to wash down my sorrows.

That's right, it's a Cubs-themed, craft beer - what better product tie-in is there for a team who plays in a facility associated with day-drinking?

This wonderful concoction was brought into this world by a small brewery in Texas, Nine-Brand Brewing Company.  How they arrived at canning a Cubs beer in the middle of Astros and Rangers territory, I'll never know.  Heck - Ron Santo himself was from the Seattle area, so there's no tie-in there either.  Anyway, this is a mystery that will go on for a while, as there is no information about the brew on Nine-Brand's website and I'm not travelling all the way to Allen, TX for the answer.  Perhaps ownership originally hails from the Prairie State?

Anyway, I haven't cracked into this just yet, as I am saving it for a special occasion.  Ron Santo is my all-time favorite player after all - I simply cannot waste his namesake beer.  However, Roger Adamson (of Certified Cicerone) describes this Kolsch style brew as, "pouring brilliantly golden in color, this... ale features a fruity nose, with hints of honeydew melon and buttered biscuits. Soft and creamy across the palate, an initial touch of honeyed sweetness gives way to a refreshingly crisp and tangy finish."

That's much more elegant than I could have ever hoped to put it anyway.  Had I attempted to review this drink, it would have sounded more like, "beer taste good."  At any rate, I'm excited to crack into this can, as Mr. Adamson makes it seem positively delicious.

Should anyone else like to get their hands on the Hall of Fame third baseman's namesake suds, it's available at a handful of Binny's Beverage Depots scattered throughout the Chicagoland area.  However, it was not at one of these adult candy stores where I discovered that Ronnie had himself a beer.  Rather, it was a generous friend who enlightened me by mailing this can to my doorstep, which - when I finally empty this elixir - will look great on my knick-knack shelf, right next to my can of Kris Bryant edition Red Bull.

P-Town Tom, of Waiting Til Next Year fame,  absolutely blew me away a couple of weeks ago with what amounted to an absolutely stuffed Cubs Care Package.  Not only did my fellow Cubbie-backer mail me Santo beer, he managed to fit all of this excellent ephemera into one cardboard box:

Yup, he even included some special Javy Baez sunflower seeds to pair with my Cubbie Blue beverage.  If I chew these seeds, will I be able to work magic on the diamond like "El Mago?"

Besides the branded groceries, Tom also managed to insulate his mobile pantry with a bunch of baseball cards, as you can see above.  Let me just say, as awesome and eye-catching as the Santo beer and the Baez seeds were, the cards ended up stealing the show, in the end.  Just take a look at some of the primo cardboard that Tom included:

As one of the premier Ryne Sandberg PC'ers on the internet, Tom must certainly have his fair share of doubles.  Luckily for me, he decided to pass the savings down to me.  Fun fact, apparently a grouping of rhinoceros is actually called a crash... so, look at this crazy crash of "Rynos!"

I think my favorite of this bunch might have to be the oh-so-90's 1990 Classic oddball.  Something about that design just makes me feel like a kid again; of course, so to does a quality stash of baseball cards featuring one of my two favorite childhood Cubs players.

Boy oh boy, does Ryno look strange in a Phillie uniform.  However, as bizarre as this sight is, there are so few cards that show the powerful infielder in his first organization's colors, so anytime I can add a new one to my collection is a joyous occasion.  After all, the Phils are my wife's hometown and favorite team, so players who have donned both jerseys are extra special in this household.

Then there's this oddball that I had never seen nor heard of before I found it in Tom's mailing.  Apparently this was some sort of mini Strat-O-Matic-like baseball simulation score card found in packs of 1993 Donruss Triple Play.  This is certainly one of the most unique Sandbergs in my most little collection - I'm sure that Tom has all sorts of fascinating oddities like this in his sprawling Sandberg PC!

Speaking of player collections, everyone's favorite P-Town resident does more than just collect the Hall of Fame Cubs second baseman.  In fact, one might argue he is even better known for his all-encompassing collection of another notable name in Chicago baseball history:

I don't know about you, but it's gotten to the point that I think of Tom every time that I come across a "Kid K" card.  While this hurler might not have ultimately ended up in the Hall of Fame with Sandberg like we Windy City faithful initially thought he would, he sure did have himself a nice career.  After all, a 20 strikeout game and membership to the rosters of four different Cubs playoff rosters (when such appearances were rare treats) will create quite a bit of fan loyalty around here.

With that in mind, I - like any Cubs rooter - am quite please anytime I can add a new-to-me Woody card to my collection.  Of which, all six of these P-Town Tom doubles were as such.  I'm especially happy to add that pre-rookie Bowman to my stacks... man, we all thought that card was going to pay for our retirement when we were kids!

However, my favorite Kerry Wood card included in Tom's expansive gift was this mirror-like, reflective 1999 Topps New Breed insert that was originally found in packs of that year's Flagship release.  This gloriously garish piece of foil board is unusually flashy for Topps and almost looks more like a slightly more toned down piece of Pacific's work.  Perhaps this was inspired by the old bubblegum company's then crazy competitor?

Gosh... I miss when there was true competition on the trading card market.  Curse you exclusive licensing deals!!

*Ahem* Anyway, back to our regularly scheduled post content:

Tom also included a cache of partial team sets from recent products haven't so much as touched - not because I haven't wanted to dabble, but because I'm kinda cheap and lazy.  I'm glad he did so too because those Stadium Club singles are - as per usual - quite elegant and gorgeous.  I mean, how can you not look at that Ian Happ pasteboard and fall in love with his impassioned walk-off celebration.  The same goes for Jon Lester's surprisingly powerful batting stroke.  SC is just a wonderful collation of cards, year after year.

Also of note, that triple rookie from last year's Heritage release features Cubs third or fourth string catcher, Taylor Davis, on his first official MLB card.  He has since appeared in last year's edition of Topps Update; that said, I still don't have that single either, for the same reasons I didn't already have these bad boys.  Thus, this will serve as a nice Cubgrade to the minor league card that had previously represented the signal-caller in my Cubs All-Time Roster Collection.

There were also another pair of delightfully shiny pieces of cardboard which feature members of the current Cubs core.  What can I say?  I am a simple man who is not ashamed of how much he enjoys shiny objects.

And now, after all of those exquisite Cubs care package goodies, believe it or not, we still have not taken a gander at the "pièce de résistance."  Rather, I should say the pieces, as in plural:

Perhaps I am the only one on the blogosphere who, after all of that, would be most excited about a pair of autographs from forgotten flashes in the pan like these two fellows, but I am not ashamed of that potential fact.  Is there anyone else out there on the blogosphere who would rather pull these than an Acuña or Betts Hancock?  If so, please weigh in below, in the comment section.

As a dedicated student of Cubs history and a collector of cards base around the franchise's all-time roster, these sorts of acquisitions are my absolute favorite.  The ultimate type of card that can be added to my CATRC binder is a Cubs autographs and - again, because I'm a cheap ass and shy as all hell - I rarely get the chance to do so.  Therefore, this certified auto of proto-Ohtani slugger/pitcher, Brooks Kieschnick, and IP-auto of strictly moundsman, Jim Bullinger, actually compelled me to get up and brag to my wife how awesome Tom is!  Both will easily supplant whatever cards were previously repping them in my most treasured tome.

Furthermore, the oft-forgotten innings eater that was Jim Bullinger is a sentimental favorite of mine and has been for many years.  First of all, Jimmy was on the very first Cubs card that can recall acquiring, a 1996 Fleer Ultra single that I was lucky enough to pull out of a vending machine at the local ice cream shop.  When I went to gloat and show off my newfound treasure to my hobby-funding and pained Cubs fan grandfather, the only words the normally jovial man could muster were "I hate Jim Bullinger" in a deadpan tone.  No doubt, Jim had just recently blown a game for the franchise with which he lived and died.  To this day, whenever I hear the name "Jim Bullinger" all I can think about is my grandfather, who loved both me and the Cubs to death.

The card in question is still in my possession... somewhere.  In the meantime, here's a Trading Card Database stand-in.

With that, we've finally reached the bottom of P-Town Tom's surprise Cubs care package, which couldn't have come at a better time.  With the way the Chicago baseball season has started, I've needed all of the care I can possibly get.  New baseball cards, Cubbie autographs, Javy sunflower seeds, and even Cubs suds... hot damn, what fun that box was to dig through - thanks buddy!  I'll be sure to try and repay the favor, I'm just not sure how I am going to be able to match this unbridled kindness.  However, I do have a few ideas...

At any rate, seeing as I'll actually be able to watch today's WGN telecast of the Cubs vs. Braves match-up in Atlanta, perhaps tonight is the night I will finally crack open that can of Ron Santo 10 Ale. After all, seeing as I don't have cable, rely exclusively on an antenna box for my live television needs, and my MLB.tv acount is basically useless because MLB STILL has ridiculously arcane blackout rules (let's fix this before pace of play, Mr. Manfred), such an occasion is a rare treat worth commemorating.  Plus, if the Cubs don't get their act together, I'll need a little alcohol to make watching tolerable.

via GIPHY